Miriam doesn't think I'm funny

Miriam, "Are dates good?"

Me: "Dates with your dad are good. He holds my hand, we do fun stuff, we kiss a lot."

Miriam: "You know that's not what I meant. Have you eaten a date?"

Me: "I ate a date once . . . he didn't like it."

Miriam, as the rest of us laugh hysterically, "I'm surrounded by idiots."